Monday, December 18, 2006

Seriously you guys

Dear Friends on the West Coast,

Remember when, for a solid year to year and a half, I was pretty certain that I either had chronic fatigue syndrome or the most extreme case of mono ever? Or how for a while I seemed to be tired all the time and was prone to falling asleep at inappropriate times and places, like class or bars? My point is that sleep is a very important part of ones life, and perhaps even more important for myself when taking into account my notorious lack of energy. I’m a complete waste of space when I don’t get at least a solid 7 hours. This is where you guys come into play. You can help me in my quest to get a good nights rest. How you ask? Well there is a time difference between Maryland and California, so to ensure that you are not depriving me of my much needed siesta you could stop calling me at 4 or 5 in the morning 3 days a week. It’s killing me. Just think to yourself, the bar just closed meaning its pretty late here so it must very late on the east coast and it would be totally inappropriate for me to call someone right now. Well actually, calling because you were reminded of the time in college that you convinced me that I was talking in my sleep about Kristy Yamiguchi is fine. That was a pretty funny joke that I had forgotten about and was happy to remember it. I still think it could’ve waited until the morning though. But Dave, come on, did you really need to call me from your vacation in Vegas just to have all of our friends chant that I’m a pussy. I know that everyone loves that chant and I’m sure that you all had a great time doing it, but at 4 a.m. on a Sunday, dammit.

I know what you’re going to say too, it’s your own fault Eric, why don’t you just turn off your phone at night? And I’d say, I’m sort of a paranoid person by nature and since my cell phone is my only means of communication the minute I turn it off at night something terrible will happen to a loved one and I will be impossible to reach for assistance until it’s much to late. So I hope your little jokes are worth a tragedy involving someone very close to me Friends on the West Coast.

I still love you though,

Eric

10 comments:

Brent said...

You weren't the only one harrassed last night. I got a text from Phil around 3am, and then a call from Dave (which I muted) about a half hour later. Both of them wanted to tell me how many black girls there were at the club they were at. I was already pissed that I didn't go on the trip....talk about rubbing salt in the wound.

Mike said...

No More Chan-Ting
Dum, Dum, dumdumdum.

The call from Dave was probably an anomoly, but by writing this you're only encouraging Hotmetal and Pat to do it more.

JW said...

I have to admit, everytime I think about that chant it makes me laugh out loud. Worse than when Mike makes me start singing "benny and the jets"

Jake said...

I had a 3 AM call last night too, but I let it go to voicemail. It was rather amusing listening to it being passed around the group for 5 minutes while I headed to work this morning. All I could really make out was "...miss... you...", "...be here...", "...plane now...", "...losing/rich...".

Before they left, Frese actually promised to wake me up at 5 AM to ask where I was (since I did it to everyone in March). I found myself staring at the ceiling at 4:30 AM Saturday morning, so I texted Frese "I'm waiting". He responded that he was busy. At 6:30 AM he got me. I waited till 9:30 AM and texted back "Returning Fire!". I hope he didn't think to turn off his phone and it woke everyone else up who was sleeping in his room.

Los said...

You know, revenge is a mighty fine drink, Eric. Call them while you are on your way to work, or something like that. Call them when you wake up on Saturday morning, and continue to do so until they get the picture. Fight, man!!!!

Brian said...

a few questions:

when you wake up and hear your phone ringing, and you see that it is someone who is in california, why do you answer it? either stop answering it or stop complaining.

or just turn off your phone. but you cant because you are paranoid that someone will call you with an emergency at 4 am and you will have to help them. i understand that fear. but my question is that if that happens, what will you do? run somewhere? i am sure if you left at 4 am you could be in virgina beach by next friday...

Eric said...

Brent - They really know how to hit you where it hurts don't they

Mike - What the hell was the first sentence of your comment. Weirdo.

JW - I actually think it's funny also, I've been known to start it myself actually. Anything to draw attention.

Jake - I like the flirty little cat and mouse came you've got going there

Los - They definitely get the early morning calls, the only problem seems to be that I'm generally much more sober than they are, so I'm coherent enough to hear the phone when it rings and they aren't

Brian - I literally never answer the phone, that's not the point, the point is while I'm generally a sound sleeper certain noises wake me up and once I wake up I have a very hard time falling asleep.

And you never know, I shouldn't have to turn my phone off just because I have immature friends.

Jake said...

Ha, good point Brian. I bet my house Eric can't run to VA Beach in that time frame.

What he actually would do is call one of us, but we wouldn't answer cause we don't have our phone on or think he's being immature. It's a Catch 22.

Mike said...

The first sentence with the "No more chanting" chant. I tried to write in cadence.

Dave said...

i called you?