Monday, August 25, 2008

A List...

A Partial List of Dead Animals That I Have Been Close Enough To In the Last Week to Catch a Horrible Disease

1. Squirrel (s)
2. Bat
3. Deer*
4. Large Bird**
5. Bat
6. Groundhog***
7. Small Bird****
8. Cat
9. Human? *****
10. Orange mystery animal ******

* It was only a deer leg. I don't want to know what happened to the rest of it.

** I think it was an eagle. My coworker disagrees. Probably because he hates America.

*** Or woodchuck if you prefer.

**** Baby eagle?

***** It was just a bone, but it looked eerily like an arm bone.

****** It was long and skinny. Sort of ferrittish, but to big. It could have been one of these. Which would have been sad, because they're cute. And not native to Pennsylvania.


Los said...

Maybe you found the bones of a Yetti, or something like that?

Paige Jennifer said...

I just got back from ten days in Guatemala and Belize and surprisingly, you saw a heck of a lot more dead shit than I did. Of course, you weren't tapped on the shoulder by a filthy man who spit like a camel and toted two guns, one of which was semi-automatic. And I don't want to discuss how I know that. Anyway, I still win!