Monday, January 05, 2009

Happy New Year? The Jury is Still Out

Things got pretty weird there on New Year’s Eve didn’t they? They did, you’re going to have to trust me on that one. I’m not going to get too into it because, well, I’m just not. If I wrote about all the dumb things I did under the influence than it would consume all of my time. While I’m sure it would provide endless entertainment to the readers, I unfortunately have a job so I’ll keep it to myself, and of course all those who bear witness. Anyway, the culmination of the weirdness took place in my bedroom at the end of the night, whenever that was. The result of which was to wake up Thursday morning to find that my closet door (which was already kind of broken) has fallen off the tracks into my wall, ripping the light switch clean off. It was quite a scene. I also noticed in the mess that I had managed to remove a blazer, sweater, dress shirt, and under shirt all at the same time. They wear completely intact in a ball on my fall as if I had just jumped out of my clothes in one move. It was amazing. I may or may not turn into Superman after my 11th or 12th vodka tonic, but that’s another story.

Consequently I had to replace the light switch in my bedroom*. Now, I’m fairly handy around the house (you can smell my super manly pheromones from there can’t you?), but I’m no Ty Pennington. Except that sometimes I get a little serious and misty when thinking about all the hardships those families on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition have had to endure (See: manly). Anyway, it’s a pretty easy process; the only issue is that it includes electricity. I have no business being around electricity. Once when I was around 8 or 9 I tried to unplug the dryer and ended up getting shot across the laundry room and my left arm turned black.

I managed to restore the light switch to working order (with the exception of the light and fans switches working in reverse) but I feel like I’m not out of the woods yet. Let’s all just hope that I don’t kick off 2009 with a tragic electrical fire. If so I might need to borrow some pants, I don’t have a closet door to shield my clothes from the flames.

*Never under estimate the importance of light. Getting dressed with only the TV to illuminate things is difficult.

1 comment:

Los said...

Electricity is a scary thing ... unless you're an electrician ... I have friends who tell me that all I need to do is a read a book about it, and I'll be fine (able to do small house projects) ... nope, not gonna do it.