There are two things in life that I really love. Actually there are a lot of things in life that I really love, like drinking outside, and sausage, and staying in bed until 2 p.m. on a Saturday. But two things that are near the top of the list of things that I really love are sports and gambling. Conveniently enough combining the two gives you a third thing I really love, gambling on sports. It just makes everything completely riveting to me. For that reason I tend to slant my bets towards televised sporting events. You could take any boring NBA game and throw a few dollars down and I’m captivated. It really makes a boring night at home with nothing to do much more exciting. You should try this experiment: bet the over on a random college basketball game tonight, watch it on TV, and then try and not be on the edge of your seat for every shot hoisted. Well actually not tonight because 24 is on. I wonder if I can bet on how many people Jack Bauer is going to kill?
Now I know what you’re thinking. Does Eric maybe have a little bit of a gambling problem? The answer to that is no. Ok, the answer to that is possibly but probably not. I rarely lose much money, and everyone knows gambling is only a problem if you lose. Just kidding. Sort of. I also don’t wager more than a few dollars on any game. I don’t so much gamble to make money as I do it to take some mundane game I don’t care about and make it more exciting to watch. A game becomes much more stirring when you have something riding on it, even if it’s only $5 or $10. Although there are urges that need to be controlled. For example, sometimes you’re looking at the lines and you see that a team that is in first place in a conference is playing a 0-19 team and the line is only -2. When things like this happen (which is totally insane by the way) you’re going to have the urge to deposit your entire bank account into your online gambling account to bet on that game, resist that urge. Even though you should have because, shocker, Loyola won by 10 and you would’ve made a ton of money on something that was an absolute lock. All right I probably just exhibited about 8 of the 20 signs one might be addicted to gambling, but whatever. I actually haven’t bet on anything in about 8 months, which is a long time. If you can go through an entire NFL season (the pinnacle of sports gambling) without betting on a game I think it’s safe to say you’re in the clear.
I did however, put a few dollars into the account on Thursday, and let me tell you, it has been good. Just a few bets here and there and I’ve more than quadrupled that account this week. That was really all just a warm up though, because in less than a week is the Holy Grail of sports betting: the Super Bowl. You can bet on anything for the Super Bowl. Who will score first, how many yards will Peyton Manning have, what will the halftime score be, over/under on Bernard Berrian catches. You name it, it can be wagered on. It’s great. With those kinds of stakes you will be totally engrossed from the opening coin toss. Mostly because you can bet on the coin toss. I think I’ll take heads this year.
Showing posts with label Sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sports. Show all posts
Monday, January 29, 2007
Monday, January 22, 2007
Just Because
Dave is complaining about the fact that I haven't posted anything today because he is bored at work. I tried telling him that I didn't really have anything good to write about. It was a relatively quiet weekend and I doubt anyone wants to read about my trip to Bed, Bath, and Beyond. He also called me a pussy for never writing about sports. So in order to entertain Dave and not be a pussy I'm going to give my opinion on all of today's top stories on ESPN.com without actually reading any of the stories. I think just reading the headlines should tell me all I need to know to allow me to form an opinion that I can share with you all.
Tomlin becomes Steelers' first black head coach
I think the Steelers have had three head coaches in team history, so duh, of course he's the first black head coach. Is this really such huge news that it's the top story on the website, I mean both superbowl teams are coached by black dudes. Also I don't think it would be a big story considering teams get fined if they don't interview minority candidates. I believe the goal of that is to give more opportunites, and create racial equality, so wouldn't you think that putting in the headline is counter productive to that goal. Everything being equal the headline should just read "Tomlin hired to replace Cowher."
Blake out; Nadal goes on
This one must be aimed at James Blake's mom, because I doubt anyone in America cares about tennis anymore unless it's a sportswriter writing another article admonishing us for not loving Roger Federer enough.
Hingis-Clijsters rematch
Rematch from when, 1999? If it doesn't involve Maria Sharapova I think I'll pass
Tyson pleads not guilty to drug, DUI charges
There is nothing that can be said about the trainwreck that is Mike Tyson that hasn't already been said. What I wonder is, how do you plead not guilty to DUI charges, isn't the evidence usually pretty overwhelming to even be charged with that? Are you going to use the "breathelizer was inaccurate" defense?
Yow to return to NC State after cancer treatment
It's always great when someone beats cancer, but who is this Yow and what exactly do they do at NC State?
Vick cleared; lab tests find no evidence of drugs
Maybe he got cleared this time but Ron Mexico definitely still smokes a lot of weed.
Cut to the Chase: Phils give Utley $85M extension
My first thought was, holy shit a general manager did something right. You have a young, rising superstar, who plays a position where offense production is scarce and you lock him up for a long time for a very reasonable $12 million a year. When bums like Gil Meche are getting $11 million a year this seems like a great deal. Then I found out that Utley is actually 28 years old, it stands to reason that he doesn't have that many great years ahead of him and he will be past his prime by the end of this contract. Maybe you should've made it a 4 year extension Phillies. This did remind me of the time Amanda mispronounced him name and called him Trace Ugly, which is still funny.
Joseph is ninth Bengal arrested in last nine months
You've got to be kidding me. You have the easiest life in the world. Sure you risk serious injury playing football, but your job is to play football. How hard is it to be greatful of the life you have and stop fucking up? Man that pisses me off.
Tomlin becomes Steelers' first black head coach
I think the Steelers have had three head coaches in team history, so duh, of course he's the first black head coach. Is this really such huge news that it's the top story on the website, I mean both superbowl teams are coached by black dudes. Also I don't think it would be a big story considering teams get fined if they don't interview minority candidates. I believe the goal of that is to give more opportunites, and create racial equality, so wouldn't you think that putting in the headline is counter productive to that goal. Everything being equal the headline should just read "Tomlin hired to replace Cowher."
Blake out; Nadal goes on
This one must be aimed at James Blake's mom, because I doubt anyone in America cares about tennis anymore unless it's a sportswriter writing another article admonishing us for not loving Roger Federer enough.
Hingis-Clijsters rematch
Rematch from when, 1999? If it doesn't involve Maria Sharapova I think I'll pass
Tyson pleads not guilty to drug, DUI charges
There is nothing that can be said about the trainwreck that is Mike Tyson that hasn't already been said. What I wonder is, how do you plead not guilty to DUI charges, isn't the evidence usually pretty overwhelming to even be charged with that? Are you going to use the "breathelizer was inaccurate" defense?
Yow to return to NC State after cancer treatment
It's always great when someone beats cancer, but who is this Yow and what exactly do they do at NC State?
Vick cleared; lab tests find no evidence of drugs
Maybe he got cleared this time but Ron Mexico definitely still smokes a lot of weed.
Cut to the Chase: Phils give Utley $85M extension
My first thought was, holy shit a general manager did something right. You have a young, rising superstar, who plays a position where offense production is scarce and you lock him up for a long time for a very reasonable $12 million a year. When bums like Gil Meche are getting $11 million a year this seems like a great deal. Then I found out that Utley is actually 28 years old, it stands to reason that he doesn't have that many great years ahead of him and he will be past his prime by the end of this contract. Maybe you should've made it a 4 year extension Phillies. This did remind me of the time Amanda mispronounced him name and called him Trace Ugly, which is still funny.
Joseph is ninth Bengal arrested in last nine months
You've got to be kidding me. You have the easiest life in the world. Sure you risk serious injury playing football, but your job is to play football. How hard is it to be greatful of the life you have and stop fucking up? Man that pisses me off.
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